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Page 9


  “What is it?”

  “I have everything set up, but King is getting suspicious. I told him I have a girl coming, a blonde, but since I never do the fetching, he’s skeptical. I need to know that you’ll send your girl in first, and give it a few solid minutes for him to buy this whole thing, before you come in all hotheaded.”

  His voice is shaky, but I guess that’s normal for drug fiends. They’re like scared little squirrels, always on edge, but if you promise them anything that can help supply their habit, they stay pretty loyal. I think it helps I keep my distance from the Stones too. Out of sight, out of mind, that’s how they all operate. They’ll never see me coming.

  “I’ll come in however the fuck I want. Just do what I asked, and make sure the meeting is set up for King and my girl. And I swear to god, Cass…” I trail off for a second and take a deep breath. “If anything happens to her, I’ll kill you with my bare hands. Got it?”

  “Oh, so she’s really your girl and not some random bitch? Never thought I’d see the day Six himself is tied down.” He laughs “But yeah, whatever man. She’ll be safe. Just make sure you don’t leave her long. You know how King is.”

  Cass went through the same shit I did, but he got lucky. Once he hit sixteen his father, King, took him out of the ring, so to speak, and used him as muscle. All of King’s drug runners and bodyguards always end up in the hospital or dead. Why a father would want to subject their own child to even bigger drug lords than themselves, or violence, over said drugs and young girls, I don’t know.

  “Shut the fuck up, and just make sure shit will go the way I want.” I hang the phone up before he can speak anymore.

  I promised Halley before I had to leave that I’d save her, and with Sonni’s help, I’m going to do just that.

  Six has tried to call me a few times since last night. But I haven’t answered. I feel humiliated. I told him I loved him, and he basically laughed in my face. I don’t want to talk to him, and I definitely don’t want to see him.

  I walk out of my room and go straight to the showers. I never showered last night, and right now all I want to do is get Six’s scent off me. I want to forget it all even happened. I want to forget about him.

  I push open the door and step into the bathroom, trying my best to be quiet. It’s past ten o’clock which means everyone is already settled in their rooms. I set my clothes on the sink, clothes Six bought me, and turn to the shower and start running hot water.

  Plumes of steam barrel out and fog the mirror. I strip out of my clothes and step in. The scalding water burns my skin, but I don’t let myself move. Dirty, dirty, dirty echoes through my mind. It’s something that has stuck with me since early childhood. Barbra would always wash me after visits with Mr. Barbie. I hated it when I was younger, but now, I almost feel cleansed. Washed and sanitized from Six’s scent. From his touch, from his taste. All of Six is going down the drain with the water.

  I try to push away the thoughts of him. I scrub my body three times before rinsing and stepping out. I don’t even bother drying off right away. I just let the water drip from my body onto the cold tile. The last remnants of Six are trapped in the small water drops, sliding down my chest to my hips and then down my legs. He doesn’t love you, Sonni, I tell myself, and it’s true, but I don’t want to believe it.

  I swipe my hand across the mirror to clear the steam away, then study myself. My long blonde hair falls messily around my face and drapes over my shoulders. My blue eyes are red and puffy, but I’ll never admit to the tears I’ve shed. I’m disgusted with myself. I feel stupid and helpless. Caught in between love and hatred.

  I shake it all away. No more pity-party bullshit. I’ve always taken care of myself, and now will be no different. I hurry and dry myself and wring my hair out one last time before putting on my clothes and stepping back into the hall.

  I only make a few feet before I bump into someone. My dirty clothes and soap fall from my hands and land loudly on the floor. I hurry to gather them and apologize, but when I raise my head and see the same bitch from the clothing store, the same one who was kissing Six, I don’t say it.

  I square my shoulders and raise my chin. “What the fuck are you doing here?” I question with venom.

  She rolls her eyes and flips her hair. “I live in the back with my grandma. I’m only here to deliver a message.”

  Ah. She must be Gloria’s granddaughter. “Shove your message up your ass because I don’t care.”

  I go to walk past her, but she steps in front of me, blocking my path. “It’s from Silas.” She looks to her nails, sounding bored and annoyed. “He said you’ve been ignoring his calls.”

  I suck my teeth and try to remind myself I don’t want to get kicked out of here. Not just yet at least. “That’s none of your business, and I couldn’t care less what Six has to say.”

  She squints her eyes. “Oh, so you know?”

  I try to figure out what she’s talking about. What can she know that I don’t? “Know what?”

  “That Dr. Keller is your mom. Is that why you’re pissed at him? Because he kept that little secret?”

  My heart starts to race, and my hands start to shake. “What?”

  “Dr. Keller…” She smiles wide. “She’s your mom.”

  My mouth gapes open, wanting to ask how she knew, but I already know the answer. Six… He had to have told her. I clutch my clothes to my chest and bolt to my room. I lean against the back of the door and breathe deep.

  Dr. Keller is my mom. Images of her fly into my mind. Her long blonde hair… Her blue eyes… Even her style. It all matches mine. “She’s closer than you think…” Six’s words finally make sense.

  I’ve opened up to her… I’ve started to like her… Did I subconsciously know? Is that why I felt so comfortable with her? I have so many questions, questions only one person can answer, and I’m sure she already knows. How could she not?

  Suddenly, my shock is replaced with anger. How did she not think that was an important piece of information for me to know? Why would she want to hide that I’m her daughter?

  “Ugh!” I let out loud to myself. I wish Alex was home. She’s hasn’t proved to be a bitch to me yet and hasn’t fucked me over. I just need someone to talk to. But since she is gone, I’m going to do the next best thing. Dr. Keller is bound to have some dirt on Six. I’m sure since his parents own this place that he has a file somewhere too.

  I throw my clothes to the floor, then go to my nightstand and grab a couple of bobby pins before stepping back into the hallway and making my way to Dr. Keller’s office.

  Once I’m in front of her door, I look down both ways of the hallway. The last thing I want it to be caught, but no one is in sight.

  I bend one bobby pin straight and the other into an L, then shove them into the lock of the door. Picking a lock isn’t the hardest thing to do, especially when you learned how to do it years ago. Click, click, click. I wiggle the pins around until the final click lets me know the lock is disengaged. I turn the knob and step inside, then close the door before turning on the light.

  I glance around the room I’ve already been in so many times, but this time it feels different and new. Dr. Keller is my mom…

  I shake my head and walk to the desk in the center. I’m only here to get dirt on Six. He wants to play dirty, then I’ll play dirty too. I can hold secrets over his head the same way he did to me.

  I reach for the drawer on the desk, but the framed pictures on the wall catch my eye. A man with green eyes stares at me with Dr. Keller by his side. Is that my dad? What’s his name? More questions I’m sure I’ll never get answered. I move my eyes down the wall and focus on a picture of a small boy. He can’t be more than ten. He’s sitting on top an old motorcycle with the green-eyed man beside him. Both of them are smiling wide. I wonder if that’s their son… my brother.

  I close my eyes for a beat and let myself feel jealous. This kid has probably had the best life with a mom and dad, and then there is me. Th
e unwanted reject. The one who has never been wanted or loved. I grab the picture and throw it across the room. It shatters against the opposite wall with a crash.

  I don’t even care if someone was to find me right now. I’d be happy to leave Harper Valley Safe Haven. This place is surrounded by nothing but liars and cheats. People who make you think they care just to pull the rug out from under your feet and watch you fall.

  “Fuck this place. Fuck Six and fuck Dr. Keller,” I mumble out loud.

  I glance at the wall one last time. Framed letters beg me to read them, and something tells me to put my anger aside for just a second and look at them.

  “James, my sweet, sweet James…”

  I read on until I reach the last line. Never forget me, but don’t let me hold you back. I love you. So much. Even in after death. XOXO, J

  It’s a suicide letter, but to who? And from who? More questions… I feel I’m drowning in a sea of unanswered questions, but that isn’t why I’m here. I couldn’t care less who the poor soul that goes by J is.

  I shake my head and turn back to the desk. I slide open the drawer and finger through all the files until I hit the one I need. Silas West, age eighteen. I pull it out and tuck it under my arm, then walk to the door, flip the light off, and slip back into the hallway and walk to my room.

  I plop onto my bed and lay the file in front of me. Do I really want to know what’s in here? Do I really want to know his secrets? More fucking questions, questions I can actually answer but don’t want to. My mind is reeling, and my emotions are all jacked up. So much has happened in the last twenty-four hours. Dr. Keller is my mom… I slept with Six and told him I loved him… Six doesn’t love me…

  I open the file, then close it again. I can’t do this, not right now. I don’t want to see something that makes me feel bad for him and just sends me right back into his arms. I don’t want to see something that makes me love Six more. I can’t do it.

  I shove the file under my pillow and lie on my side and try to process what my life has become in the last few weeks. I guess shit has been better than ever, but it hasn’t at the same time. I’ve been forced into therapy sessions to relive my fucked-up past, I’ve been blackmailed, I’ve had my heart broken…

  I shake it all away and stand from my bed and start pacing my room. I’m not sure what I’m doing, but I feel if I sit and wallow any longer, I’m going to send myself into a panic attack. And panic attacks alone are the worst.

  Looking to my bed, I see the corner of the manila file peeking out at me. Taunting me, begging me to read it, but I don’t give in. Instead, I grab my phone and hit the Spotify app. The SEXY SIX playlist is already open from the other night. I click Play and sing the lyrics of “I Fell In Love With the Devil” by Avril Lavigne as loud as I can without getting caught.

  Six really is the devil. He’s ruthless and mean, arrogant and self-absorbed. He uses his good looks and knowledge of shit he should have no clue about to get what he wants. He’s sin on fucking legs, dragging anyone who looks his way to hell with him.

  My music stops playing to let my phone vibrate and dance on the nightstand. I stomp toward it and see Six’s face flash on the screen.

  My finger hovers over the Decline button as my mind races. Before I can actually hit it, it hangs up but starts ringing again a few seconds later.

  I want to scream at him and call him every name under the sun, but I know it would do no good. He’d probably get off knowing he hurt me. So instead, I decide to play it cool and use him the same way he used me. He wants my help? He’ll have to fucking pay for it like we originally discussed.

  I hit the green button and bring the phone to my ear with a deep breath. “What the fuck do you want?” The deep breath did nothing to calm me. My words are still laced with venom.

  “Change of plans. Tonight,” he barks. “We have to do this tonight.”

  I want to tell him no and that things will only be done on my terms, but a little girl behind delicate pink curtains flood my mind. I can’t let her suffer just to make my point.

  I stay silent for a beat before I finally open my mouth again. “I’m only doing this for Halley. Understand that. And once this is done, I want nothing to do with you.” My heart shatters further as the words leave my lips. It’s not truly what I want, but I know it’s for the best.

  “I’ll be there in thirty minutes. Wear the dress” is all he says before he hangs up.

  I stand on the curb fidgeting with the hem of my dress. It’s too short, and the beading along the neckline that dips low to the cleavage of my boobs scratches my skin. This is the last time I’ll be caught in a dress.

  Headlights paint the road from a car turning onto the street. I don’t need to see it to know it’s Six. The rumble of the engine is low and smooth, just like his voice. I grab the strap of the duffel bag that’s over my shoulder and squeeze it. Everything I owned before I came to Harper Valley Safe Haven is in here along with Six’s file.

  I wanted to read it, and I tried after getting off the phone with him, but I couldn’t. There were no notes on sessions with Dr. Keller. Only medical files and pictures… Picture of a small boy with the same eyes as Six. They were sad and lifeless, a way I never want to picture Six.

  I vowed to myself I would help him only for Halley, and that’s what I plan to do. After tonight, Harper Valley will be nothing but a distant memory to me. A memory I’ll fight to forget.

  I slip into the passenger side of the car and close the door. Six isn’t in his normal attire. He’s wearing a suit, but I don’t let my eyes linger on him too long. It’s dark anyway.

  “Are you ready?” he asks, almost too low for me to hear.

  I nod once, not trusting my voice to not crack in his presence.

  Instead of pulling away from the curb and driving into the night like I thought he would, Six pulls the e-brake up and turns off the lights.

  “Sonni, listen,” he starts, but I don’t let him finish.

  I turn in the seat and glare at him. “I’m done listening to you. Let’s just get this over with.”

  He shakes his head with a chuckle. “Fine.” He lowers the brake and turns the lights back on.

  After thirty minutes, we are pulling up to a curb beside an extravagant house. Nothing like the run-down, dingy-looking house from before. This place is… beautiful.

  Golden lights shine along the white brick, the bushes have patterns cut into them, and the yard is massive with a water fountain in the center.

  “What are we doing?” I ask Six, confused. This isn’t the same place Halley was.

  “We are getting Halley.”

  “But…” I glance out the window again and see a tall thin figure making its way toward the car from the dark street. Panic starts to set in. No one is supposed to know I’m here with Six. I’m only the distraction.

  Six reaches out and squeezes my hand. “Don’t worry. That’s Cass, my connect.”

  I jerk my hand from his hold. “Don’t touch me,” I hiss.

  Before he can reply, Cass is at his window. He doesn’t move to roll it down right away. Instead, he turns back to me. “You’re the only one I trust, Sonni.”

  He sounds sincere, but I don’t buy it. “Whatever.”

  I try my best to sound unbothered, but the truth is, my heart beats faster when he’s around. It tells me to forget everything and just give in, but my heart is stupid. I did exactly that and was humiliated.

  Now isn’t the time to think about all of this. I’m here for one reason and one reason only. Halley. And once she’s safe, I’m gone.

  Six starts talking again. “Look. Just be you. No one will touch you. When I come in, that’s your cue to leave. Don’t try to stay and be a hero. Shit can go bad, very fast, and I’m not sure how King will react to seeing me.” He bites his lip the way he always does.

  “So, you’re telling me you don’t actually have a plan? I’m just supposed to go in there and hope for the best?” I squeak out.

  “C
ass will be there. He won’t let anything happen to you. I just don’t want you to see or hear what I have to do.”

  I want to pry and ask why. I want to know what he’s going to do, but now isn’t the time. I’m supposed to leave after all this shit. I don’t need Six holding me back. I need to forget him, not worry or wonder about him.

  I just nod as he turns off his car and opens the door. I throw my duffel bag into the back seat, hiding it from view, and step out too.

  Six gives me one last nod as we stand by the hood of the car before he disappears into the neatly cut bushes covered by the dark.

  “Okay, just follow my lead,” Cass says from beside me.

  I drag my eyes up and down his thin body. “Why are you helping him? What does he have on you?” I ask.

  “Halley is my sister. No one may believe it, but I want her out of this shit as much as him.” He nods toward where Six disappeared. “No one should have to live the lives we have.”

  His lean frame shakes the slightest bit as he speaks. I’m sure he’s rolling, but I don’t doubt what he’s saying. He wants Halley out too. He probably just doesn’t have the balls to pull something like this off.

  I give him a tight smile, then straighten out my skintight dress and fluff my hair. “Let’s do this, then.”

  Suddenly, all my thoughts are focused on Halley. Fuck Six, fuck Dr. Keller, and fuck Harper Valley. Once Halley is safe, I’m out of here.

  I take a deep breath and follow Cass up the long, curvy drive. Once we are at the front door, he gives me one last look with his eyes shining fear before he pushes it open and steps in with me close behind.

  “King!” he yells, his voice echoing off the wooden floors.

  No one responds. He shakes his head, then paces farther into the house. The low hum of music spills under the door we stop in front of. The bass sends chills down my spine as the rapper talks about money.